Statistic Nightmares

It's little wonder Buddy looks sad, we both heard the same statistics.





I was watching CFAX radio this morning when Micheal Campbel did a commentary of a recent study comparing Federal Employment growth/wages to Private Sector growth/wages from 1999 to 2009.

Needless to say I immediately got a migraine. Once it cleared up I went on line to check some facts.

According to CD Howe, from 1999 to 2009 the Federal Civilian Salaries grew at an annual rate of 7%. In cash amounts the wages went up 90% from 12.8 Billion to 24.4 Billion and the economy grew 55% over the same time period. The workforce of Federal employees grew 35% and the Private employees grew 11% over this time as well. The average wage increases Federally for this period grew to 59% compared to Private Sector growth of 30%.

The average Federal Government employee salary reached $94,000 compared to $47,500 for Private Sector workers from 1999 to 2009.

I have to agree with Mr. Campbel, if this is Conservative and Liberal restraint then give the rest of us some. Really this comes down to "Do as I say not as I do."

You have to ask, Where is the explanation?

Just my opinion but really………………….

Hummingbird Nation

Here's a little video about Hummingbirds set to a piece of music by Jeff Beck.

Wieners, Republicans and Gun Toting Jihadists.

The night before last I watched a bit of the Rachel Maddow Show. Yes the majority of the show was about Wiener Gate. She was busy comparing Republicans who have lied, done inappropriate things and still manage to keep their jobs and are not forced to resign. Democrats, it seems are given a rougher ride when they exhibit their stupidity.

Not belittle the situation Mr. Wiener find himself because after all he is not the only idiot that Emailed, Facebooked, or Twittered his privates into the internet ether. How stupid are you? Would you leave a pair of shit stained underwear out for the company to see when you invite them over for dinner? No, I think not. Why, because no body wants to see your dirty laundry or find out you like to be spanked with a hot waffle iron. It's just creepy.

I digress, I really wanted to talk about Guns and Republicans. Apparently the Republicans voted down a bill that would require a mandatory background check before the purchase of automatic or semi automatic weapons. These same Republicans helped create the 'No Fly List'.

Here's the thing, it was pointed out that apparently these suspected terrorists can't fly but they could take a car, bus or train to one of the big American Gun Shows and buy an Automatic Weapon without a background check. To prove the point there has been a video posted.

Here's a link. http://www.fixgunchecks.org/detail/alqaeda-video


Ya gotta love America, can it get any weirder?

How to get Lost.

I enjoy technology, most everyone I know embraces some form of technology. I like flat screen TVs, good stereos, my Nano, Digital Cameras my Blu Ray Player. Lots of stuff, fridges, stoves microwaves even my car.




I have a problem with GPS devices though. Get a map, it's old technology but at least you'll have a sense of where you are going. You can actually Google a location and figure out a course, then use your map. That's what I did last time I was on the mainland and had to go to Coquitlam.

I'm not saying a GPS doesn't have a purpose cause it does. When you have an accident GPS can send your co-ordinates to EMS. The police can track stolen cars, cel phones, and airplanes, all good things that is if it gets the location right.

For years I've heard 'Men don't ask for directions', which is true. Some lazy guy came up with the idea to eliminate the need to ask for directions. Hence the creation of GPS. The only thing that GPS doesn't do is say "Hey Idiot, you're Fucking Lost, you should have asked for direction or brought your map." Then it would be great.

Why am I on about GPS, well here's the thing. Yesterday I spent an hour and a half scrambling through the bush with The Duck and the TCD Hat . The Duck and I had called up the TCD Hat because we needed to know if this sunny knoll we found was in our new park or not.

Now this little adventure would have been fun if I was still 12 or 13 but at 58 scrambling over bush, through wild raspberry cane and dead falls with crotch pieces snags seemed not to fit into the fun category. It soon fell into the WTF zone after the first GPS reading. So much for GPS and the phrase, "We're almost on top of the pin only another 10 metres in this direction."

It was all good for ten minutes and then it wore a little thin. "We're not in park, the park is that way." By the time we found the eastern park boundary we had scrambled through about 3 1/2 acres of dense vegetation only to find (at least in my opinion) we were lost. Now that's when the GPS should have told us, "Hey you idiots you're fucking lost in the woods again."

You know how we got back into the park? We walked west towards the sun, that's how. The GP fucking S didn't tell us to do that. Fifty year old Cub Scout training taught us that. So here's my theory, if you want to get really lost in the woods use your GPS. If you want to go into the woods and find your way out, bring your cel phone, look for landmarks, check the sun and bring plastic ribbons to mark your path. If you keep finding your ribbons, you're walking in circle so make the phone call.

"Hi Honey, I'll be a while, I'm lost in the fucking woods again."

Just so you feel you have learnt something, a TCD Hat is a Tilley/Crocodile Dundee Hat.

Be of Good Cheer

"Be of good cheer," speaks the moderate voice in my head, "Be of good cheer."

The full fog of conservative ideology has swept across the land and Senor Hardcore has won the majority he greedily desired.

"Be of good cheer," speaks the moderate voice in my head, "There still is a future to be made."

It will be an interesting next four years. Four years for the NDP to establish themselves as a viable opposition and stifle the socialist fear that still lingers from the sixties. The sixties when my generation was at odds with the conservatives and wanted everyone to be equal and stand under the new NDP banner developed by Tommy Douglas and the CCF . The sixties when our conservative parents held John Diefenbaker to sky and called out for God and Queen to, "Bless him for he is our Leader."

Yes the sixties when the Liberals decided that the middle ground had to be somewhere between Right Wing and Left Wing. When P.E.T. rose from the back benches and became Pierre Elliot Trudeau, the new Leader of the Liberal Party and took the country by storm.

What's this I see? Is history or histiore repeating itself? Who is that I see rising from the back benches? Is that?…….. Is that?….. why yes it is. Justin Trudeau is still standing after this massive defeat of the Liberal Party and appears to headed our way. The reins of leadership lay on the ground, will he take them to grip and and bring the Liberal Phoenix to flight?

He has four years to build a party that truly reflects the moderate, social conscience of our nation. A party without the corruption of past politics not run by the boys behind the closed doors.

We can only wait and see. It's only four years,a lot can change in four years.

Promises & Warnings

I have come to the conclusion that if elected I propose a new law. The new law would make it mandatory for all campaign promises to include a warning or disclaimer statement.

These warnings should be similar to the warnings we get with medication or as seen on TV drug ads.

Here's a sample from my Ramipril medication.

"Do not take while breast feeding or when pregnant. Tell doctor your complete medical history. Drink fluids and avoid getting too hot. May make you dizzy. Use caution while driving. Caution; Be careful not to stand up too quickly. Tell doctor if bothersome cough develops & persists. Tell Dr. of slow pulse. Avoid potassium salt. It is important to check blood pressure regularly."

The warning writers try to cover all the bases for drug manufacturers. If you complain about their product, their response is "Did you read the warning information included in the package? You didn't? Well then it's not our problem, you should read warning labels." Simply put, "Screw you, you weren't paying attention!"

A Conservative political campaign warning should read something like the following.

"Any promise made in this election will be implemented, if we get a majority and in five years after balancing the pending new budget. Implementation will take place when and if the party wins a second majority. Implementation will take place only if and when a second budget containing the promise is passed. Promises either made or implied during the election campaign may be subject to change with or without notice. The party reserves the right to ignore any disappointment created by this promise. If depressed by the lack of implementation of promises, please line up to see your doctor."

A Liberal warning would look something like the following.

"Any promises expressed or implied during this election campaign will be implemented, if we form a majority government and or get approval from the other parties in the house of commons. Each promise will be sent to the new Standing Committee on Current Promises, and be evaluated prior to implementation. Promises made during this election will be implemented only after we have a good look at the previous government's books. Evaluation of these books may cause nausea and belt tightening. Belt tightening may cause dizziness and loss of promises. If this occurs line up to see a doctor at a local clinic"

An NDP campaign promise warning would be similar.

"Any promises expressed or implied during this election will be implemented, if we form a majority government. This may cause general numbness and freezing over in hell. Claiming to be a member of the Conservative Party would be recommended should the USA invade due to the election of a true socialist government."

If we don't read the warnings, the parties can just do the same thing as the drug companies. "Screw you, you weren't paying attention!"

I just realized something, they say that anyway. I just wasted a half an hour and some of your time. I guess I could run for office after all.

To quote the Tim Meadows in the movie Walk Hard; "If erection lasts longer than four hours ……….call more ladies."

Now that's a Warning Label.

Election Trash and Bash

I got up way too early this morning 5 am. I had the misfortune of watching Mr. Harpy call the election for May 2. You may ask why misfortune? I will try and explain my position, by not just saying I think the whole thing is just stupid, even though it is.

What I saw this morning was a great example of when power and ego circumvents logic. I watched bemused as Mr. Harpy basically pushed the fear based agenda that global governments for years perpetuated to control (us) the unwashed masses.(example: Nazi Germany, Lybia, Iran, Iraq, France, Great Britain, etc. get the point) Maybe Hugo Chavez is almost right, there is no life on Mars not because of capitalism but because fear based politics.

Instead of just translating into English and into French, we should of had someone translating into Plain Speak. I think it would have gone something like this.

Harpy, 'They are bad and we are good. We've been doing a good job and they have ruined it for everyone. If we don't get a majority, Canada will go to hell quickly and fall into confusion. You, will loose everything because the Liberals, NDP and Bloc are all liars. Don't listen to them, they're sneaky and liars. Look at the state of the world, disasters, financial crisis loom over us again and there is trouble in the middle east. If you don't vote for my party, all these things will happen here in Canada.'

Fear based politics.

Wouldn't it have been nice to actually see Mr. Harpy come out and say he was excited to go into another election. Here is an opportunity for him to speak positively about the work they have done and the potential work they will do in the future. But NO, he couldn't do that.

I managed to watch the other party leaders speak to our huddled masses. Mr. Agnat, seemed excited about the challenge his team would face and seemed focussed on trying to make us believe that the Liberals could form the next government. However, he is going to get cranky having to answer the coalition question over and over and over again. Mr. Cumlayton sounded like Barak Obama wrote his speech. Lizzie May appeared to be getting messages from the Green Man while speaking and I almost thought she was being translated because there seemed to be a disconnect between her words and her mouth. Probably just a technical problem, because she wasn't allowed to speak until Mr. Cumlayton had finished and probably got ahead of herself.

Actually the best thing this morning came from Mr. Cumlayton and Ms May. First, Cumlayton said, 'Ottawa is broken and we now have a chance to fix it.' Then Lizzie said, 'It is important for us to vote, don't let the scare tactics keep you home and let's put an end to attack ad politics.'

I might even vote for both of those reasons. The other thing I would like to see is Mr. Harpy red faced. He can blame the other parties as much as he wants for this election but in truth it is his ego and greed for power that has fuelled this situation and nothing else.

Did I mention I think the whole thing is stupid. That's just one man's opinion and it happens to be mine.